The taste

Sometimes I think I just have the weirdest taste in women.......

small talk

Sometimes I just don't get it with people. I feel like I've been left out with my socializing skills and I need a seminar. What's up with all these jokes? faking laughs is a bit tiring. Okay.. I'll do it for some of those single liners but..... hey, maybe Im just stupid.. since Im the only one not laughing here. Thank god for the beer. alcohol really takes out some of the stupidity in talk.

world became darker

just click to see full size. you can use it as wallpaper if you like.

P.I.T.

Its dark in here. Im swimming in neck deep black sticky tar. can barely move. this fluid seems to pull me in everytime I try to get out. It seems alive. waiting for me to lose my strength before devouring me whole and pull me into its abyssmal depths..... I face my head north and see a tiny speck of light. the only thing I need before giving up all hope. a direction... a guide... like a map given to a lost traveler, more precious than water. this speck is so little like a dust. but so visible in the pitch black darkness. so I swim slowly, conserving my little left strength. still this light seems so far on the horizon. but I'll keep swimming, until I reach the light...........

Post sickness state

This week is finally over. and some things ended with it. one is the flu.

Have you ever felt that you are being a prick sometimes? last friday I did. I felt like I was in my own world. Everything sucked.. nothing is funny and every joke I heard was so damn corny. I felt like everything people was talking about were nonsense and a total waste of time. I felt like this all day and thankfully I didn't let anyone know what I thought. I just worked and avoided as much contact with people as possible.

what is it like to be a heretic

If you're 555 then Im 66 sick. (slipknot song)... this just came to my mind cause im sick right now. Took a half day leave today. Could'nt sleep last night coz my head really ached. This usually happens coz flu triggers my sinusitis. might as well relax myself by watching korean movies hehehe. yep. that's my thing right now. tragic, mushy, tearjerking korean movies where someone always dies in the end. Ill recommend some top picks.. first, Il mare, everyone has probably seen this. its remade with sandra bullock starring. second, Bunjee jumping off their own, yes, that is the title, you must watch this, its like gay stuff but not actually..my last recommendation is lover's concerto. the story is probably the most unlikely to happen in real life, its ridiculously tragic. but the characters are very interesting. adding to the effect is the fact that the cute actress starring in it has actually died from suicide.

so much things not happening

haven't been blogging much and there's only one reason why. nothing is happening. everyday is just the same....work, love, life. nope nothing happening with those. Well at least I got a bit of alchohol in my veins last friday...

I'm currently listening to a lot of the music of this band SAOSIN. for those who have'nt heard of them. I'll say they're one of those "emo" bands. not that it's a bad thing. To describe their sound. they're like thursday and taking back sunday but heavier. also a bit like finch with less screaming. The songs are usually about relationships. very fun to listen to. melodic and heavy at the same time. although I doubt I would still be listening to this stuff 2 months from now. check out the song You're not alone (very positive lyrics). also recommended cuts are voices, collapse, I can tell there was an acid, i never wanted to and my personal pick 3rd measurement in C.

the rain has come

The rainy season has finally come. 2 tropical typhoons droping buckets of water to the ground. With all this water also came a wind of confusion......

scenario: I was sitting in my desk, doing what I was supposed to do... tracing functions and stuff.. I looked to my right. I saw something, something I have always seen before but have never seen (hehehe). Everything so simple is now... not..... humpty dumpty can't be put back together again

uchi e kaeritai

it means, i want to go home.. things here in manila are a bit going down.. first, my job is getting uninteresting, Im begining to have doubts about my growth in this company I am working for. That's because I'm currently involved in a project I don't have any interest in. Second is this place where I live in. its very unpleasant and Im having trouble agreeing with some policies. then theres the traffic, the people, the food, the lcd advertisement inside buses, the shity music on the radio, the long long lines... its during times like this that I miss my hometown most. my family, my house, our dogs, the food (in hefty servings not like here), my friends, the music, the live gigs, strolling in our small mall..........

a bad day

the day started like this. so I got in the office pretty early today. I opened the pc, read the mail and saw a notice from our logbox (yep our loxbox does that), it said, I was unable to login yesterday and I was considered absent. I said "there must be something I can do about this". So I went to my manager and asked him what I could do. the look on his face was not that pleasant, he was like.. "try to go to the hr". so I did. I went to our hr and asked what I could do. to my surprise. there was nothing I could do to revoke what happened. I was like $#!%. so I donated a whole days work is that it?........(okay, I said something more polite).. she said there was nothing she could do. Man. I felt mixed emotions. I got back to my desk feeling stupid, sorry (I kind of gave an impolite gesture to our hr), and angry, not knowing at who I was angry with. So I tried to review our online policy page like a lawyer trying to find a hole in the system. and there it said that if in case you forget to login, you will be considered absent ... okay then, no use crying over spilled milk.

scrapes and scapes

here's some view to get the mood down

start the rant

I now firmly believe. hell smells like garlic..............

anyway.. with that aside.. I would like to say something more or less a bit important.. There is one thing I kind of regret. its not getting into a good university.. When I was in high school, my parents never failed to encourage me to get into a a good university, most of my classmates were also trying to do it. so why not me? cause I have a tendency to not want to do what everybody else is doing, thats why.. You know, when we were young we sort of have this type of ideals. I said to myself. I'm not gonna learn more stuff even if I get into a good university. getting smart was a matter of choice. I can be as smart as those kids if I just studied hard enough, even in an unknown university.... anyway I was not into all that school spirit stuff.. Then after graduation. I got this chance of studying in UP.. there I realized the difference.. here it is... Its the people you meet in these schools that make the difference.. people who can make you change how you think just by talking to them.. these are the people who aspire to be world leaders (seriously).. its through conversations with these people that you learn more, you get to know what you want to be, what you want to do, what you can do... so there it is.. yes you can be as smart or smarter than the smartest person from the top universities... but then wouldn't it be better if you can meet them?

a love poem

I read this poem from a comic book called "david chelsea in love"

Why do you have to ask?
are you a brand new fool?
I'm the way you feel when she treats you cruel!
I've got a sad clown face and a pair of horns..
because you're wishin' that you'd never ever ever been born
you don't suit her taste
she don't like your face
she thinks you're toxic waste
so you've been replaced!

you're twenty three years old
it's time that you been told..
the way to hold on to your woman is to treat her cold

see, if you fall in love
you're gonna be in dutch
you better start off with a woman you don't like that much

and if you say "i love you"
then she''ll say "no thanks"
keep your big mouth shut
she'll fill in the blanks

show up late for dates
or don't come at all
tell gher she's a mess
make her feel small!

don't give her no slack!
keep her way off base

let the woman know that she can be replaced!


nice poem huh? there goes my chance with meeting girls...

Marketing, shmarketing

There's one thing I am completely bad at....marketing.. I hate it. I can't sell anything for nothing.. But nomatter how much I hate it. I want to learn it. This I believe is a skill one must have to succeed in this world. In fact, its not a skill one must acquire but "THE SKILL".. When you're good at it. you can sell crap for something.. don't kid yourself and say technical skill is more important. not in this dimension its not. its marketing. how did you think Bill Gates made the millions?? definitely not because he programmed an operating system..

breather

At this moment I am literally having a hard time breathing.... the lack of oxygen supply to the brain is making it a bit hard to think about what to write. mhen.. I never imagined how unpleasant it is to live in a house with people in the food business........

hajimemashou

k now... how do we start this. lets start with an introduction.... Everything you read here will be true.. whether an occured event or a product of imagination. some (or most) will not be so pleasing.. some will not be so brooding.. some are dark, some are boring. but I promise you this. just like jonathan davis once said. "your'e not getting rageddy anne". No I will not be dramatic.. I will try not posting any musical lyrics.. no poetry here sorry... no love messages.. neither hate messages... ok there will hate messages... yes there will be whining about how bad life is.. yes there will be complaining about a life half wasted, money lost, ideas thrown away.. yes there will be posts in languages you might not understand.. yes I will be using more than one period.. stupidity? yes there will be... bad grammar.. poor diction... redundant vocabulary....... yes I will sometimes use quotes to look smart.. they will mostly be by unknown people or taken from bad movies.. so here goes.. let me unintroduce myself... I am male.. I am currently a member of the corporate machine, still on the ratrace (kiyosaki) trying to get out.. how old am I? lets just say Im 1/3 from the finish line.. hmm come to think about it.. maybe Im half of the way.. moving on. Im not yet married, no kids.....now for the getting to know me part. lets do this together hehe.. I do drink beer. don't do drugs, occasionally smoke, I don't do sports, do read sometimes, I do play an instrument, do watch movies, I listen to all sorts of music.. no, I would not classify myself as a rocker.. I do know some stuff about computers.. do have one... can program one, can fix one, knows specs.. but no, I would not consider myself to be a nerd. That is a title I am not worthy of. I believe in GOD whoever he is. I believe in luck and that I don't get my share of it. I believe in determination, in the possibility of destroying the stereotype.. always going against the flow. changing the constitution, having a new platform of government.. now this is going political... people.. I once answered a friendster survey asking what annoys you? answer=people. people are impolite. the older we get the shitier we become. physically and morally we go from dust to dust.. peaking at about 25 and its downhill from there.. in all aspects.. looks, virtue, faith, intellect. its nature.. lets just not fight it..... well lets just stop here for now.